Science & The Bible: The Missing Baby Steps

It seems like scientists always like to poke their noses into the Bible to explain how God “really” did things. Every now and then, we’ll get some sort of special on PBS “explaining” how God did the Ten Plagues through Moses, or we’ll find a documentary giving us the “inside scoop” on Creation. I wonder why these scientists don’t bother figuring out the small miracles before moving on up to the big miracles? That would make sense, wouldn’t you think?

Here are a few of the smaller miracles I’d recommend for scientists to “figure out” for us:

  • I bet politicians all across the world would be thrilled to get their hands on academic papers explaining how Jesus knew the hearts and minds of people around Him. Since this is done on a regular basis on stages in Las Vegas, I think it’s an easy one to figure out, and scientists should start here first.
  • Scientists should provide plausible explanations on how Jesus, Peter and John made the lame to walk (and leap and dance) instantly without going through months of rehab. An addendum could discuss insights as to how Jesus made the blind see (even if it took two passes). Naturally, a special chapter would need to be devoted to negative events, such as Paul blinding Elymas or Peter killing Annanias and Sapphira. Come to think of it, I bet the pharmaceutical companies have already figured this one out, and they’re sitting on the information so as to protect  their profit margins.
  • Water and metallurgical analysis used to hypothesize how Elisha made an axe head float would be extremely useful to people doing deep-sea exploration. Oil companies and treasure hunters would pay millions – possibly billions – for this technology!
  • I’m sure zoologists and hunters of all stripes (and PETA too) would be quite interested to read papers that shine the light of science on Elisha calling out she-bears to eat the youth who teased him. This would be another self-funding study. Fair warning – I expect PETA would sue if somebody tried to use this technology.
  • The UN should spearhead a commission to study how Jesus fed 5,000 and then another 3,000 just a few days later using just a few fish and loaves. Imagine the world-wide hunger they could alleviate once the science behind this could be figured out!  (Then again, I bet the UN leaders have already figured out how to make water to wine. That would definitely explain the free liquor at their HQ restaurants and cafes. And their total cluelessness.)
  • Surely there’s some kind of study out there evaluating various techniques Jesus might have used to cast out demons. How about a follow-up study showing how 9 out of 10 scientists favor one exorcism technique over the other? Although most corporations would shy away from such studies, I’m sure Benny Hinn and the like would gladly pay money for this.
  • And surely same politicians would be jump at the chance to review scientific data showing how God killed 185,000 Assyrians in one night. Imagine settling wars overnight with no traces of radioactive or chemical warfare left to pollute innocents and civilians. Like PETA, we expect human rights groups would file suit should anyone use this technology to stop Islamic radicals.
  • Getting personal for a sec – I could use an expose on how resurrections take place. There’s quite a few of them in the Bible, so this definitely warrants scientific scrutiny. I’d even chip in money to help fund these studies ..especially if I get to use the technology on myself!

But no – instead of useful studies, these scientists spend all their time, effort and energy on the biggest miracles of them all:

  • Creation: how “the LORD made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and everything in them in six days” (Exo 20:11), and
  • The Flood: how “He wiped out every living thing that was on the surface of the ground, from mankind to livestock, to creatures that crawl, to the birds of the sky, and they were wiped off the earth. Only Noah was left, and those that were with him in the ark.” (Gen 7:23)

And during their spare time, these scientists might slow down and try to do 10 miracles in one shot by telling us how the Ten Plagues “really” happened.

Why is it that only these huge miracles get all the attention. Whatever happened to “walk before you run”?

If they get these lesser miracles right, then maybe they might be qualified to tell us how these larger miracles took place. Ya think? …and they’d make a ton of money in the process, too.

I think they should do go for it.

And if they can’t figure out the small stuff, maybe – just maybe – they ought to quit trying to figure out the big stuff.

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